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I jumped into adulthood with the purchase of my first car, a silver 2003 Volkswagen Golf. I remember scraping together enough for a downpayment on a base model that came with manual windows and an antiquated tape deck, which left me no choice but to shell out extra for a CD player. I paid little attention to fees and taxes since the glossy pictures in the brochure sold me on the car months before. Making the biggest purchase of my life at the time was terrifying, but driving it for the first time was exhilarating as a new sense of maturity and freedom washed over me.
 

My new car saw me through several life stages, and sitting on my dashboard, a tiny stuffed bulldog accompanied me throughout it all. There were the shopping trips across the U.S. border, friends' bachelorette parties, and that unforgettable road trip through the Maritimes with my husband.
 

My car was my safe space to have a good cry, give myself a pep talk before a big interview and shelter me as I waited out a downpour. Years later, I tightly packed all my belongings in it to move across town. It always filled me with pride to fit an impossibly large piece of furniture in its tiny trunk. And years later, when my kids arrived, it was my faithful car that drove them from the hospital to their new home - all while I nervously sat next to them in the back. 
 

Thirteen years later, when people told me it was time for a new car, I was quick to remind them of all my car’s merits - low mileage, barely any rust, it was practically new! But the failing suspension, the engine light that was on more than off, and a horn that blared whenever I turned the ignition, became hard to ignore.
 

I said goodbye that fall, taking pictures and running my hand across the vinyl dashboard one last time. My car was the last thing that remained of the old me - the independent me who was free to drive anywhere, and for that, it will always hold a special place in my heart.

 

Today, I’m more chauffeur than explorer, but my bulldog still patiently sits on the dashboard ready for our next adventure.